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A Timeline for Creating Social Anxiety

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Here's a timeline for creating social anxiety. I'm wondering if any of this resonates with you?
A Timeline for Creating Social Anxiety

How anxiety is created for us

Here’s a timeline for creating social anxiety. I’m wondering if any of this resonates with you?

  1. A lot of us who are neurodiverse got disapproving, negative, or socially isolating messaging, often without explanations as to why.
  2. So we’re left to our own devices to troubleshoot why.
  3. But people are so complex. What works in one situation doesn’t in another, so gathering data is hard.
  4. Believing we are the problem seems the obvious answer.
  5. Avoiding people seems like the obvious solution. People can’t hurt you that way.

Avoiding people seems the obvious solution; people can’t hurt you that way.

But here’s the thing. The people who hurt you did it because of their own pain, not because there is anything wrong with you.

And at least some, if not most, or possibly all of them aren’t in your life anymore. So you get to choose how much space they get in your head.

Yes, I know it’s not as easy as just choosing not to think about it all.

It will take work to heal. But you can do it. Bit by bit.

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Heather Cook

Hi, I’m Heather. I’m an Autistic writer, advocate, and life coach, and I'm building a life I love. I help other Autistics to build their own autism-positive life. I love reading, jigsaw puzzles, just about every -ology, and Star Trek!

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